What do you mean I don't have a list?

I love checking things off a list. For my wedding, there were lists for my lists. I make lists at work, and I love checking things off that list. Grocery shopping, I have to have a list or we end up with Good and Plenties and no toilet paper. I am an unashamed list maker. It is hard, sometimes, to have a God who doesn't make me keep a list. How am I supposed to check stuff off if I have no list? The anguish, the worry, the wondering... Am I saved?

I don't doubt my salvation. I believe in God in 3 persons. I believe He sent his Son to die for me, and I believe that He rose from the grave. (I may joke about Jesus being the first recorded zombie, but I'm only joking). My flesh cries out to be a part of this. To take my filthy rags that I want to call righteousness to God and say "See Lord! Look at what I did!" Like a child going to its dad with a finger painting. Only my finger painting is like poo, worse than poo! I love how the heavenly father, our Goel (redeemer!) says to me "Mel, you don't need to do anything more. I've got this."

This comes because I have been reading Galatians and I'm a Martha. I'm pretty sure Paul would have been my homeboy, and he wouldn't have approved of me using that term but would have let it slide because he's cool like that. I love Paul's letters, they are straight forward and he pulls no punches. He doesn't sugar coat the issue, he dives right in. The Galatians were being foolish (Paul said so, Galatians 3:1) because they had gotten caught up in having a list. (I would have so been a Galatian) There list included circumcision and other Jewish customs that they were being told they had to do if they wanted salvation.

How I love Paul. He lays down the gauntlet. He says "Look, Really? Do you not remember who I am? (Insert Paul's testimony). Now that we have got that taken care of. If we could be saved by the law then Christ died for nothing." To wrap it up, Paul points out that our lists, our good works, aren't what save us. I am very excited to see how Paul wraps this up. So far, I have learned that faith (trust in someone), justification (being made right), and righteousness (morally right) come from God. Not from me. My justification before God comes from the fact that I am seen as he sees Jesus. How? Because Jesus was the lamb, because he went to the cross, because he died for me and you, and everyone.

I just started chapter 3 in Galatians and I'm excited to see what else Paul shares with this church. Nate and I have decided that we need to stay home more. This gives me more time to dig in the word. To crush the grapes of truth so I can get the wine of comfort (I totally stole that from Spurgeon). I am just glad to be reminded that I don't need a list with God. All I need with God is to get to know him, to allow him to be my Goel.

Yep, the tomboy is finally starting to understand the romance in scripture.

You want me to what????

So there I was. Feeling all bad ass about myself because I've done this before. I conquered warrior dash last year. This year, its on. Right? WRONG! Nothing like being made to eat humble pie over and over! First of all, I've gained back all the weight I lost. I have decided that newlywed weight is BS and it has to come off. Mostly because if I am going clothes shopping it is not because I need a larger size. Second, I want to own warrior dash next year.


You might be thinking, but you finished right? Well, yes. I did. However, I couldn't do some of the obstacles because of my knee and the fact that I didn't have the upper body strength. (there were only two that I went around). All is not lost though. I did learn some lessons and practical applications from attempting to kill myself. Here is what I learned.


1. Physical obsticals are great metaphors for mental ones. It is very easy to say I can't. How do we know we can't? Have we even attempted the thing that we are afraid off? For me, fear is what leads me to say I can't. It is easier to sit on the sidelines and wish for what could have been, then to take that leap of faith. Where does the strength come from to surmount our fears, our obstacles?


What was pointed out to me over and over during Saturday was that all things are possible through Christ. Bear with me on this, it will make sense. Nate stayed with me the whole time. I know that he wants to run it, but I love him for staying with me and cheering me on and not letting me give up. There was one obstical that I did and it scared the crap out of me. Platforms a few feet apart at varing heights. Yep, not my thing really. I got up on one and there was Nate he helped me over the rest. I had to put aside my pride and allow him to help me. If not I would have had to get off and go around. That would not have been cool. I finished, I made it over all the platforms, but not on my own and that is ok.

How often do we take that one step on to that first platform of faith and see the chasim between it and the next platform? How often do we step off and go well, I must not be called to do that because its too hard for me? Did we ask Jesus to step up and get us across the chasim? Did we allow our Savior to work thru us and show those around us his glory? Those chasims are not for us to cross on our own. They are for Jesus to come can carry us across. If we do it all on our own how can we show the world how powerful our God is? Just imagine what happens though when you cross the uncrossable because Jesus took you to the next platform.

In 1 Timothy 4:17 it says "but the Lord stood at my side and gave me strength, so that through me the message might be fully proclaimed and that the Gentiles might hear it. And I was delivered from the lions mouth." The thing that I need to remember most is that the Lord is at my side and He is my strength. He will be there.

2. I have an amazing husband. He is a godly man who points me towards God. We always seem to have deep conversations when we are driving somewhere, so I cherish the time that we have in the car. God is good.

Being Married

It will be three months tomorrow. Three months of marriage. I feel like it has been longer, but in a good way. The biggest thing I have learned is that marriage will teach you how to be others centered better than anything. One of my hardest issues is that I sometimes I forget that I don't always have to be the strong one. It is ok if I don't know all the answers. God has given me an amazing husband and I need to remember to allow him to be a husband.

Is it easy? Not always. If it was easy the divorce rate wouldn't be nearly as high. I love that Nate and I took the time to go through pre-marital counseling, but that we are honest with each other. We talk about money, children, family, and God (not in that order) all the time. I think this allows to remain on the same page. We don't always agree, but we always come to an agreement.

For example, God has blessed Nate with a gift of finance management, and sometimes I have to be reminded about the difference between needs and wants. Jesus said that we will be taken care of. I have to rest in that. I have to trust my husband to meet my needs. After being single for so long I forget sometimes that there is another person in the equation, and I just do.

It is late and I haven't updated on what I've learned from being married, so here it is.

1. Others first makes life better

2. Jesus as your headship, makes putting others easier. In fact, I can't do it with out Christ. I couldn't do anything without Christ.

3. No is not a bad word. In fact, Nate and I are learning to say it. No we can't go, we are staying home. :)

Next post: Warrior Dash - Lessons from the battle field.